I strive for perfection. Like many perfectionists, this can lead to procrastination. If I don’t think I can meet my standards on this task right now, well, I’ll do it when I do have the time/supplies/inspiration/knowledge to do it “right”. That is what happens here with this blog. That’s what happens with my plans for entertaining. That’s why I can’t organize that closet or start that craft. What if I do it wrong? Worse yet, what if someone notices that I could’ve done better?
Screwed up…that’s what that is. I am trying to ease up on myself. Cut myself some slack. And I am making tiny strides in the right direction. Today I finished a Christmas present for my mom. Each year we give her scrap book pages for an album, so she has a record of what our families have been up to the last year. It is 10 pages or so. I didn’t have mine done. I brought it along and tried to do some at the in-laws in HomeTown, but there were a lot of people there and I couldn’t concentrate on the journaling. Then I realized that I didn’t have some supplies I needed/wanted. It crossed my mind to tell my mom I’d finish them and mail them next week. Then I thought I’d do what I could, and tell her I’d finish up and get them to her on Saturday at brunch. That would buy me time to go out and get new supplies and do a better job. That would also cost me money. Money I didn’t need to spend. Instead, I finished the pages at my sisters when I got there. They aren’t up to my usually standards but I decided not to make any apologies or excuses. It is what it is…and my mom loved them. After all, she wants to see what is in the pictures. For her it isn’t about being the most polished layout.
It is what it is…I should consider that attitude more often. It felt good to say it today.