All my life I was taught to look like I had it all together. And so I did. Look like it. I don’t think I always felt like it was all together, but that wasn’t the important part. The image…that was what we were after. It wasn’t said but as the oldest in the family, it hung in the air. Set the example. Make us look good. Be the best. The whole world is out there, yours for the taking.
I think a lot about that. I work hard these days at leaving things undone. At going to bed instead of finishing one more thing. At letting people see my weakness. Lord, have I got weaknesses.
People have said things to me like “YOU don’t know how to do that? I thought you could do it all.”
I want to scream at them. But it is me…I put the can-do-it-all image out there. The perfectionist that lies just below the surface can’t stand this undone stuff.
And so I haven’t been very productive today. Not in a to-do list sort of way. I slept in and then did some record keeping for work while in my pjs. After a shower and grocery shopping I read a book that I’m really enjoying. The rest of the day has been spent window shopping until stores closed and a meeting with a friend over a hot cup of tea. Now I have a little more time before my guys get home from ice-fishing. And I will probably spend all of it here. Thinking and writing.
What looks like lazy is not lazy at all. It’s hard work for me to play all day.
I know progress is being made. At a school event last week, a friend was complaining that she has too much vacation time and her husband doesn’t have much. She didn’t know how to use it up…even saying “I just can’t stay home and do nothing!” I told her she should try. That it was really nice to just take a day alone to read or putz around. She said she’d feel too guilty. My sweet hubby looked at me and said “Yeah, she used to say that too. But now she can relax.” I don’t think the other moms got it…but I sure smiled.
In fact, I’m taking a week off in March. I’ll spend the first few days at a scrapbooking retreat and then spend the rest of the week at home. I have some projects I’d like to get to and some crafting to do. And some reading. Who knows what I’ll leave undone that week.
How about you? Are you up til all hours finishing things up? Do you make time to relax and play? Please tell me…
I’ve got a cup of hot tea and the sun is shining. My favorite kind of Friday! I had a funny week. Things popped up on the calendar unexpectedly and it got a little hectic some days, but I declare a victory! We made it through without casualty.
I love looking ahead at a weekend…the anticipation of what is to come. Other than church Sunday morning, there was nothing on the calendar for the two days. As part of my attempt to do more with friends (I really haven’t been doing enough to cultivate friendships lately) I emailed a friend I haven’t talked to for months! We are meeting for coffee/tea tomorrow morning. I am really looking forward to it. We are planning our Friday Night Blitz tonight which will leave tomorrow open for filling more bags and maybe even taking out my sewing machine or some other craft supplies.
Sunday I am taking a short shopping trip with Grace. She leaves from school today for an overnight stay in the Twin Cities and a speech meet tomorrow. She won’t return until later tomorrow night, so shopping will fall on Sunday. For Christmas she received “money” for a room redo. We are looking around at fabric for curtains to replace her closet doors. Next month we’ll get going on the actual work.
So today I’ll straighten up and finish laundry so that cleaning is quick tonight. My cup is empty and the kids are ready for circle time so I suppose I better scoot before I have a ankle-biter uproar!
Please visit the other entertaining coffee girls over at Rachel Anne’s place, Home Sanctuary! It’s a great way to spend a little (or a lot) of time.
A couple of weeks ago I came across the 40 bags in 40 days challenge for Lent. I don’t even really know how I got there…surfing around one evening. I am not Catholic, nor have I ever given anything up for Lent, but this year I’ve felt a nudge to step it up. I was wondering what I should be doing differently…thinking about where I need to grow. Right now I feel there are two things holding me back. One is STUFF! Oh the stuff. I love it and I hate it. But I know it is getting to be too much.
Enter the 40 bags challenge. I could do this!
I set out thinking this would be pretty easy. And so far it is going well. I went through a big stash of yarn that my mom gave me. Some I kept for my own projects and most I donated to the local middle school. They are doing a knitting clinic with kids next week and had an ad on the radio that they needed yarn. Beautiful timing. I went through big stacks of magazines that I’ve been saving. Most are getting recycled and the newer ones are headed to the library.
I think as the weeks move along this will get harder and the sacrifice will really kick in. And that’s good too. I am already finding that I am looking around my house with new eyes…and a little embarrassment at how I’ve let things accumulate.
How about you? Are you a saver or a thrower?
At dinner last night I was talking with the kids about my mission to declutter this house.
Me: Mom feels claustrophobic in her own house!
Stanley: I know mom. I get claustrophobic in tunnel slides.
Yes son, something like that.
Going into this week I was feeling pretty good. The normal kind of busy, but that’s about it. Or so I thought.
I went to middle school conferences on Monday. I always go down to the music dept to visit with the band director. He’s a quirky guy and I don’t think he gets many visitors. He mentioned something about the concert Thursday. Mental note – I don’t think I know anything about a concert Thursday. So when I got home I checked…nope nothing on the calendar about a Thursday band concert. I decided to figure it out tomorrow (today).
This morning as the first daycare family was coming in, Stanley produced a permission slip from his backpack. A field trip coming up. Ok. Set it on the counter and I’ll take care of it later today. He said it was due on the 22nd. Whatever…I’ll do it for tomorrow. Oh. The 22nd was YESTERDAY. Great.
As I cleaned up the breakfast dishes a friend called to see if I’d be at a meeting tonight. Again I don’t have any recollection of it. I said that if my co-leader couldn’t make it I would try. After washing dishes I’d call my co-leader. I glanced at the calendar on the wall next to the sink, hands still soapy, trying to figure out why I didn’t remember the meeting. Well, I hadn’t written down the meeting but I did write down a dentist appointment for tonight! Hadn’t remembered that either.
Eventually I did get details on the band concert. I lined up my co-leader to go to the meeting. I got my teeth cleaned. My son is all set to go on that field trip.
So here’s the organizational system that would’ve helped:
Buy calendar done
Write pertinent information on calendar
Periodically check to see that info is UP-TO-DATE
Look at calendar at least weekly (preferably daily)
Seems simple. Think I’ll try it.
Two weeks ago I was knee-deep in tax work. Yesterday was my tax appointment. Now I have my life back. No more checking and double checking figures. No more late nights. No more procrastinating. Done.
If I wasn’t so darn tired I’d jump up and down with all the excitement. Instead, I’ll be going to bed early.
How ’bout you? Have you worked on your taxes yet?
Hours and hours ago I started entering numbers into my computer in preparation for my upcoming tax appointment. I am thrilled with the amount I got done today. I would say I’m 75% done. That is HUGE with almost 2 weeks left until the appointment. My goal is to finish by Friday. If I stay motivated, that is very possible.
Now I’m going to head to bed. Sunday will be a long (but fun) day. We are traveling tomorrow for a day in one of the bigger cities near here. First a lot of wrestling to watch, then some shopping and dinner out. Sounds perfect after a day at the computer.
Ever notice how good it feels to accomplish something you’ve put off for too long?
I hope your weekend is proving to be a good one too!
Also…my girl got an Excellent ribbon at her first ever Speech Meet today! What a kid!